Zima we hardly knew ye!

By OWEN MORRIS

Man, if I only had a nickel for every Zima I’ve downed, I’d have 15 cents. That’s right, I’ve managed to choke down smoothly enjoy three ice-cold, refreshing Zimas. The last one was right before entering a high school dance. (Note to high school males reading this: Nothing says “manliness” to your date like chugging a Zima too quickly and then throwing half of it back up in your mouth.)

It looks like those memories will have to tide me over the rest of my life, because Zima is soon to be no mas.