Maeret Lemons discusses being a stand-up comedian in KC, missing the Czar Bar, doing what she loves and more in The Pitch Questionnaire
Name: Maeret Lemons
Occupation: Stand-up comedian; co-founder and creative director of kcstandup.com
Hometown: I like Lenexa.
Current neighborhood: My mom’s basement
What I do: By day, I book and promote comedy shows, design fliers and maintain kcstandup.com. By night, I’m a working stand-up come-dian and performing all over the Midwest.
What’s your addiction? How much time you got? Ha! Seriously, though, I’m addicted to creating. I’ve found it’s the only thing that fills the proverbial void.
What’s your drink? You buyin’? Then I’ll have a Ketel One dirty martini with a couple of olives. If I’m buying, beer in a can will do.
Where’s dinner? You ever been to iPhotower? I could eat there every day. How many places can you get a banh mi sandwich and a bun, and wash it down with a mojito while at a rave?
What’s on your KC postcard? The skyline. I’m such a sucker for the Kansas City skyline.
Finish this sentence: “Kansas City got it right when …” It developed the West Bottoms into what it is today. I was an interior designer for almost a decade before I became a comedian, and I’ve always had a heart for the creative use of existing structures in favor of demolition. I think we are trendsetters in the way we brought new life back to that part of our city.
“Kansas City screwed up when …” The Czar Bar was shut down! Haha, I know the “city” didn’t close it down, but hey, I’m still super-bummed about it. I started my comedy show there, and it’s still my favorite room in this city to do a comedy show. It’s the perfect-sized venue, and the vault is simply unforgettable and totally unique. Comics were like, “I want my picture on that stage!” It was a fun run of shows. We had Chris Cubas (who just won @midnight the other night), Conrad Courtney, Mike Baldwin, Dustin Kaufman and so many more.
“Kansas City needs …” To go to more comedy shows! Seriously, though, we could use some love in this town. Most of KC has no idea how many legit comics we have right here, not to mention the countless others who stop here on tour.
“I always laugh at …” Myself. It’s not really a day for me unless I spill something on my shirt and accidentally swear in front of an elderly person while buying butt wipes for my kid.
“I’ve been known to binge-watch …” Arrested Development.
“I can’t stop listening to …” Lykke Li, “No Rest for the Wicked.”
The best advice I ever got: It wasn’t verbal advice. But I watched this wise man play skeeball once, and he always went straight for the highest scoring hole every time. That’s pretty much how I live my life. I’d rather die having written one Reservoir Dogs than 100 Lifetime made-for-TV movies. No disrespect. Just how I am.
Worst advice: “Just marry someone! As long as you both love Jesus, it will work out!” I’ve never been married nor am I a Christian, but you asked what the worst advice I’ve ever heard was, and that’s literally the dumbest thing I’ve actually heard someone say.
My sidekick: My lil’ buddy. My main man. My 7-year-old son, Micah.
My dating triumph/tragedy: I met my partner in crime doing my thing. I was up on a chair in a short dress hanging a comedy poster inside the Riot Room before they opened, and he saw me and hasn’t stopped hollerin’ at me since. We created kcstandup.com together. Our backgrounds and skills complement each other so much. It’s pretty awesome being with someone to collaborate with creatively. It makes both of us better at what we do.
My brush with fame: I got to emcee for a week at Stanford’s Comedy Club last December for April Macie. Not only is she an incredible female comic who has traveled the world, but she’s also nice as heck. I got to have girl talk while eating Swedish fish with her in the green room. Pretty cool to share a moment with someone like that.
My soapbox: The world would be a lot better place if people insisted on loving and caring deeply about what they did “for a living” (whatever that means). A steady paycheck is simply not a justification for living a soul-crushing existence. Quit your job! Follow your heart! Life is too short to spend 40-plus hours a week doing something you don’t enjoy. Even if you don’t hate it, that still isn’t OK. Find something that matters to you and find a way to make money doing it. If your heart’s in it, there will always be renewed passion and ambition to persevere when it gets hard. Haha, cuz it will. If it wasn’t, everyone would follow their heart.
What was the last thing you had to apologize for? Accidentally changing the channel with my butt.
My recent triumph: Maintained sanity while on an extended customer-service call with AT&T.
Lemons plays the Roast of Zach Smith, 8 p.m. Friday at the Riot Room (4048 Broadway), and performs 9 p.m. Monday at the Hookah House (730 Massachusetts, Lawrence).