Madcap Noir


Woody Allen’s latest romp through Old New York combines (among other things) a skirt-chasing insurance investigator with the charm of a rodent, a wise-cracking Vassar grad who takes no guff and a nightclub hypnotist in a sequined turban who doubles as a major jewel thief. The year is 1940. The soundtrack warbles with nostalgic Duke Ellington and Harry James tunes. Thanks to the brilliant Chinese cinematographer Zhao Fei, Manhattan’s art-deco office towers and smart supper clubs are bathed in shimmering gold light. The dialogue, Allen’s own, is a useful hybrid of two period icons — hardboiled Raymond Chandler and softboiled S.J. Perlman.

In sum, The Curse of the Jade Scorpion is a thoroughly likable, if familiar, Woody Allen comedy — not the most original or revealing tintype in the director’s gallery, perhaps, but blessedly free of the self-conscious hand-wringing and tortured navel-gazing that impede the former Mr. Konigsberg’s more sluggish efforts. From start to finish, here’s good, swift fun, all dressed up in an array of brown fedoras and slinky satin cocktail gowns.

In the realm of deluded social misfits, the stammering but self-important insurance man Woody plays here — one C.W. Briggs, ace investigator for North Coast Life and Casualty — holds his own against any of the screwed-up gag writers and bungling talent agents he’s portrayed in the past. Convinced that he’s both an intuitive genius and a slick ladies’ man, poor Briggsie plows through life on legwork and luck. Somehow, he tracks down a missing Picasso portrait but has trouble, amid all those cubes, finding the nose. When his play in the seventh race at Aqueduct runs seventh, he laments: “Never bet on a horse that has Parkinson’s.” When it comes to snappy one-liners, Woody Allen still has no peer but Perlman. And maybe the Marx Brothers.

He’s not bad as a casting director, either. Once again the writer-director-star has gathered supporting actors who suit their roles like rhinestones on a cigarette girl or the shoeshine on a lounge lizard’s wingtips. Helen Hunt (an Oscar-winner for As Good as It Gets), gets the plum as Betty Ann Fitzgerald, a fast-talking, college-educated efficiency expert. Meanwhile, Dan Aykroyd oozes oily resolve as Magruder, the blustering office manager who undertakes an illicit affair with Fitzgerald, and the supporting office workers (flirty Elizabeth Berkley, plain-as-day John Schuck and Wallace Shawn) are perfect miniportraits of prewar striving. A bit later we behold Charlize Theron as steamy Laura Kensington, a spoiled rich girl straight out of film noir. Slumming with the skinny, bespectacled hero in his disaster of an apartment, the platinum-blonde vision of luscious curves and unbridled presumption lets fly with what may be the movie’s most Woodyesque jibe: “It’s exciting to be in a grungy hovel with a myopic insurance clerk.”

If Woody Allen has learned anything in the decades separating Bananas and Sweet and Lowdown, it’s that you can never go wrong trashing revered movie genres with relentless attacks of wit. Before he’s done here, Allen has happily savaged the lowlife insurance men of Double Indemnity, the conventions of all those business-world comedies from the ’50s (Desk Set, et al.), even the alluring mind games of the Hitchcock canon. As for his hometown, not since Bullets Over Broadway, in which he spoofed ’20s gangster movies and backstage melodrama, has Allen so ably riffed on the bygone pop culture of the city he loves so much.

Categories: Movies