Hide your lips

It used to be that strawberry lip balm was a big deal. And when Chapstick introduced raspberry as an alternative, watch out. Also, a potentially disproportionate number of middle school girls enjoyed eating watermelon lip gloss — perhaps that’s why it’s not seen so often these days? But now generic fruit flavors seem passe in light of an army of food-flavored lip balms that sound remarkably unappetizing.

Apparently junk food is no longer for just inside your mouth. There’s corn dog lip balm, which “will keep your lips plump and moist just like a hot dog inside that delicious fried corn bread batter.” And Twinkie’-flavored lip balm — on sale, no less. Chocolate and gummy lovers can purchase everything from Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup flavor to Bubble Yum-inspired lip balm. But sadly, it appears as though Cheetos-flavored lip balm has been discontinued.