East Side Story: Bingo Bob and the Salad Bar

Meet Bingo Bob. Bingo Bob takes his job — calling the bingo games in the tiny dining room adjacent to the salad bar at the Hy-Vee at 1525 E. 23rd Street in Independence — very seriously.

Bingo Bob sings, tells jokes and calls those bingo numbers every Tuesday, from 1:30 to 2:30 p.m. and his weekly appearance always draws a big crowd — mostly elderly people, of course, who happily maneuver their walkers and their portable oxygen tanks into the room to be as close to the soda fountain as possible — because that’s where Bingo Bob stands.

A friend of mine who works in Independence insisted I come out for lunch yesterday to see Bingo Bob work the crowd. He’s a charmer, I must say, but it’s one of those performances that one only needs to see once. And maybe not even that.

As for the Hy-Vee salad bar, which my friend called “a great bargain,” it’s an all-you-can-eat affair for $6.99 (beverages are extra) and generously laden with stuff I didn’t particularly want to eat. The deli also sells hot sandwiches, including two kinds of burgers, a grilled ham-and-cheese and the very worst grilled cheese sandwich I’ve ever had in my life. The cheese wasn’t even melted.

I left before Bingo Bob had finished the first bingo game. “Don’t leave,” my friend said, “the prizes are stuff from the store. Like loaves of bread.”

Man cannot live by bread alone — even at a bingo game.