The police will not tolerate your marijuana enthusiasm

The Kansas City Police Department knows that today is a “day known as a holiday in the drug culture.” We’re sure your attention’s probably already wandering, hippies, but if you can keep it together long enough to finish this post you’ll be glad you did.

Ok. Today the KCPD will be coordinating with other police departments to monitor metro roads and specifically watch for anyone who might be stoned behind the wheel. They’ll pay special attention to the areas around schools. So remember that driving high still counts as a DUI.

Hey! Hey! Stay with me! Nachos! That Looney Toons episode where Elmer and Bugs perform opera!

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but the jig might be up. They’ve

already cracked the secret code, this press release says they know how

it’s in “all kinds of rap, hip hop and rock songs your kids may be

listening to.” They even know the story – how high schoolers in San

Rafael, California. met after school to smoke up in 1971 and how they did it

at 4:20 p.m. because that’s when detention got out. Jesus, they know

everything! If anyone knows who the traitor in the ranks is, out them

in the comments section.