‘Where to Find Us’ is here to save queer singles from Tinder

Where to Find Us // Photo by Tania Olah

Where To Find Us held their Cowboy Carter-themed queer dating event at J. Rieger & Co. on May 22, and it was a “SWEET HONEY BUCKIN” good time.

The fringe-laden crowd prepared itself to hear pitches. The subjects being pitched? Hopeful queer singles that have decided to explore beyond the trenches of online dating. Slideshows, faux Buzzfeed quizzes, and a guessing game were all used to showcase singles. Where To Find Us takes the position of “wing man” to the next level—truly a unique experience brought to us by founders Tiffany Watts and Lo Cowan.

This hoedown was the fourth event held by the two hosts, and the turnout was excellent. Drinks were flowing, Beyoncé was playing, and laughter was found in every corner of the room.

DJ Munch kept the party going with country hits and an almost always active dance floor. Drinks by J. Reiger were available, as well as a coffee cart from El Café Cubano, which was needed for a post-work event. The tunes and caffeine prepared everyone for a lively night full of hopeful singles looking for connections.

Now, you may be wondering, What do you mean pitch your friends? Well, through slide show presentations full of fun facts, personal info, and lots of jokes about lesbians being friends with their exes! These pitchers got very creative in selling their singles, who were red-faced in the crowd watching. My favorite pitch was probably one that served as a compatibility quiz, with questions around how they like to spend their free time or opinions on deal breakers for the pitched single.

Photo by Kaylynn Mullins / Design by @bxbbly & @partiesbyxo

After a few pitches, there were breaks for games introducing more prospective daters and a stellar drag performance from Karmella, who performed with Chappell Roan for her Kansas City Midwest Princess Tour. The night had a great flow to it that prevented the event from feeling like a corporate conference of just sitting and listening, leaving plenty of time for singles to mingle between pitches.

However, the crowd would become sort of meek after each pitch. I was wondering… Did anyone actually approach them afterwards? That’s when Holly, an attendee, noticed my sticker saying I’m with The Pitch. She directed me to her friend, who was talking with Lillian Tollison, one of the pitched singles of the night.

Tollison’s friend, Amelia, advocated for her to the crowd of nearly 200 people. “She’s a really great person,” says Amelia. “And I don’t think she’d ever go out and tell people how great she is. I knew this was the only way to get her out there, and she did amazing.”

When asked why Tollison agreed, she says, “I haven’t had great luck on dating apps or at bars, so I figured, ‘Why not?’” Tollison and the person she spoke to seemed to be headed toward an actual date, so I think the Where To Find Us method has some validity.

Aside from all of the glitz and glam of everyone’s cowboy outfits and balloon displays, having queer spaces continues to be of the utmost importance. With the shit show of political happenings stealing the spotlight in most of our minds and lives, it’s important to let positive queer experiences take center stage as well. Yes, community work and voting, and all of that hands-on activism are very important right now. But so is building a personal community to hold you up.

Where To Find Us offered a fun, flirty night for people to get out there and meet each other on a personal note. It’s even more impressive that the night mostly centered around Lesbian/Sapphic people, as so many queer spaces tend to be predominantly male. It was such a large turn out with queer people of every orientation, gender, race, and age dusting off their boots and looking for love—Which I think we need now more than ever.

If you’re bummed you missed their fourth event, then be sure to mark your calendars for their upcoming KC Pride Fest debut.

Pitched will be presented June 7 at 6 p.m. on the Vivent Health Stage. Get your tickets at kcpride.org, and maybe you’ll meet that special someone.