Totally Killer delivers DCOM vibes with a side of blood and a smidge of time travel hijinks
Could it be better? Sure. Do you need it to be? Arguable!
Totally Killer. // Courtesy Prime Video
There are an inordinate number of millennials out there (I count myself among them) who harbor a deep fondness for spooky Disney Channel Original Movies. Is that fondness earned? Not really. The generational obsession with Halloweentown, Don’t Look Under the Bed and Mom’s Got a Date with a Vampire has more to do with nostalgia for that weird spot in time when we were still young enough to trick-or-treat for another year or two, and not quite old enough to truly appreciate John Carpenter or Wes Craven movies.
If you’ve ever wondered what a DCOM might look like if it had adult-appropriate jokes and a legitimate homicidal streak, Totally Killer may be the movie for you.
The Nahnatchka Khan-directed time-travel slasher features a similar level of production value and cheeseball storytelling, with slightly better performances and grown-up humor that should pull a successful chuckle or two out of anyone older than 15. It’s not great by any means, but if you plop on the couch with a couple of pals, a bowl of popcorn and some apple cider looking for a good time, you’ll probably find it.
Back in 1987, a murderer called the “Sweet 16 Killer” stalked and stabbed a group of popular teenage girls in small town Illinois. Three girls died, but the killer was never caught. 35 years on, townsfolk and true-crime obsessives flock to the location every Halloween for themed tours, wearing the killer’s signature getup—basically a Max Headroom mask with an earring.
Jamie (Kiernan Shipka) is the 17-year-old daughter of the only survivor of the Sweet 16 Killer, Pam Hughes (Julie Bowen). Pam’s final girl ordeal has made her a little overbearing, so it’s no surprise Jamie resents her mom and her goofy dad (Lochlyn Munro) for being overprotective. On Halloween night, Jamie heads out to a concert with her best friend Amelia (Kelcey Mawema) and narrowly misses the Sweet 16 Killer striking again, this time at her home.
The attack ends in tragedy, but fortunately the school science fair is coming up, for which Amelia has built a working time machine—go figure! Jamie uses the machine to go back in time and work with 16-year-old Pam (Olivia Holt) and other pubescent incarnations of most of the adults in her life, to stop the carnage before it starts.
Totally Killer. // Photo by James Dittiger
Totally Killer gets some mileage from its fish-out-of-water plot, with Jamie increasingly horrified at the lack of safety precautions or personal boundaries in practically every situation. Shipka exudes charm, sarcasm and shock that helps sell these reactions, though Jamie is so hyper-aware of every inappropriate comment and “unwanted touch” that she often seems like an ultra-woke gen-z caricature rather than believably nonplussed.
The movie is more slasher parody than actual slasher, but even in a comedic setting, you want the kills to hit and the vibes to be chilling enough to keep you watching. Totally Killer doesn’t quite deliver in this regard, and its lack of ability to fully commit to its genre keeps it from hitting as well as it could. The themes here—grief, a self-aware heroine, a gimmicky killer—bear strong resemblance to Christopher Landon’s Freaky and Happy Death Day movies, both of which successfully balance humor and legitimately gnarly horror.
It’s hard to watch Totally Killer without wishing it went anywhere near as hard as its Blumhouse brethren (sistren?)
Khan’s comedy background serves Totally Killer well, giving it just enough charm to eke by. However, there’s a strong sense of wasted potential in this movie that a director with more genre chops might have been able to do more with. The cliche-ridden script doesn’t do the film a ton of favors, though Shipka and her teen castmates commit hard enough to elevate the material.
You probably won’t remember this movie more than a day after you’ve seen it, but sometimes you aren’t looking for memorable. Sometimes you’re looking for a movie to put on the background while you carve a pumpkin. You’re looking for DCOM vibes. Consider this the Mike’s Hard Lemonade version. It’s not the good stuff, but it’ll deliver the sweetness and the buzz you’re after.
Totally Killer. // Courtesy Prime Video
