They’re Partying At Denny’s Now?

In a move that fills me with confusion and suspicion, Denny’s is trying to make their restaurant chain “cool” by creating a pseudo-subculture called Denny’s Allnighter. They’ve got band like Rascal Flatts, Sum 41, and the Gym Class Heroes creating items for a special “Rockstar Menu.” I swear to God—I can only wish that I was making this up, because it seems like something that was conceived by the Onion.

Anyhow, ridiculous or not, the restaurant chain will be “hosting the official Warped Tour after parties this year at 23 lucky locations,” and Kansas City’s date of August 4 is one of those “lucky locations.” The possible bands for said afterparties are The Devil Wears Prada, Hit the Lights, Sing It Loud, A Skylit Drive, Dance Gavin Dance, Breathe Carolina, Attack Attack!, Therefore I Am, Innerpartysystem, TV/TV and This Providence. I’ve no clue as to exactly who we’re getting out of this, other than there will be five of them, but after looking at that list, does it really even matter?

After digging through the blog on the Allnighter site, I’ve come to the conclusion that these afterparties are nothing more than the bands showing up and everybody eating at Denny’s. Why? I mean, I know you’ve got to go somewhere, but the nearest Denny’s to Sandstone is a good twenty minute drive away. There’s a Go Chicken Go right down the road, and that’s way more punk rock than Denny’s.

[insert joke about Warped Tour not being punk here]

You need to RSVP, which you can do here. Still, I can’t help but feel that trying to market Denny’s to scene kids isn’t any less arbitrary a decision than trying start a campaign to make hipsters drink Michelob instead of PBR.

Categories: Music