Studies in Crap: The itchy, whiskery horror of macrame

Each Thursday, your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from basements, thrift stores, estate sales and flea markets. I do this for one reason: Knowledge is power.

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Creating With Macrame

Author: Suzanne Stiles

Date: 1971

Publisher: American Handcrafts

The Cover Promises: Wookie-hair jellyfish!

Representative Quote:

“Macrame is the ONLY craft and art form that has been practiced in EVERY civilization throughout history.”

Your Crap Archivist has nothing against most of the hobbies his mother has taken up over the years: scrap books, shadow-boxes, the contemplation of Oprah’s favorite things. But I always found her macrame abominable. That thready wheat Chex of a purse! Those coarse plant hangers braided of twine and whiskers, still the most effective pet-hair accumulators known to science!

Still, when I somehow forced my eyes to look upon Suzanne Stiles’ Creating With Macrame, mom’s handiwork leapt in my esteem. Turns out, she hadn’t botched those projects. No, even in the early ’70s — an era that was to the square-knotting of fuzzy thread what the late ’50s were to stealing the black man’s music — macrame tended toward the hideous.

Take this Silly String tribute to the nervous system.

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