Stealing Time: Forecasting Funkhouser’s status

State of the Line introduces the “Funkhouser Adjective Alert System,” giving us a color-coded warning system of the mayor’s status. “So right now we’re somewhere between ‘beleaguered’ and ’embattled,’ ” State of the Line forecasts. “Let’s just hope we don’t reach the last two on the list.” Now if we could just get some Gloria Squitiro warnings. Squit Beacon red, racist comments ahead. Squit Beacon white, bathroom rendezvous in sight. Squit Beacon blue, Joe Miller’s tears flow anew.

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