Special Report: Jay Leno has always destroyed what he wants in the process of acquiring it

​Each Thursday, your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from basements, thrift stores, estate sales and flea markets. I do this for one reason: Knowledge is power.

If Roast Beef Could Fly and Leading With My Chin

Date: 2004; 1996

Publisher: Harper Collins; Simon & Schuster

Discovered at: Goodwill

The Covers Promise: The intimate thoughts of a man with no apparent capacity for self-investigation

Hey, Can You Tell Which Quote Comes From the Book for 4-Year-Olds?

“As you can probably tell from my burger story earlier, I have a deep love for meat, and it began early.”

“Ironic but true: McDonald’s was responsible for my career in comedy.”