Man’s moral right to force himself on his wife: Studies in Crap and The Choices of Men take back the night for men

Each Thursday, your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from basements, thrift stores, estate sales and flea markets. I do this for one reason: Knowledge is power.

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The Choices of Men: A Novel of Male Power and Sexuality in a Feminist Age

Author: T.S. Tyrone

Date: 2001

Publisher: 1st Books Library

The Cover Promises: “For too long, we’ve been hearing a monologue and women have been doing the talking. Choices gives men a voice, too.”

Representative Quotes:

• “‘If I stay home and let my hormones loose on my disinterested wife, at her whim with a simple 911 call, I can be charged with marital rape and carted off to jail where the odds are greatly in the other guy’s favor that I will be the one who actually gets raped while my wife gabs to her friends all night on the cordless about my despicable behavior!'” (page 56).

• “The reason this book is first being published electronically is that fiction print publishers are dominated by female editors who know that primarily female readers buy fiction.” (page 157)

By 2001, the long-oppressed straight American man had had enough. He’d let women get jobs. He’d let them net two-thirds of his income. He’d even adopted the use of “they” as a singular pronoun in cases where he felt uncertain of the antecedent’s gender.

But wouldn’t you know it, some of these uppity gals still don’t put out on demand, even to their husbands!

Such is the dilemma faced by Guy, the hero of The Choices of Men, T.S. Tyrone’s self-published novel about men reclaiming control of their family lives … and their wives’ points of entry. Imagine the Promise Keepers, but horny.

Here’ the situation. Guy’s wife Jill won’t sleep with him, even though Guy pays the bills. This spurs Guy to contemplate the economic realities of their relationship.

“She can’t have it both ways. Either she earns the right to a regulated monopoly by providing service to the customer or I damn well am entitled to go out into the free market to get my needs met.”

Maybe he should spend some time with that free market’s invisible hand.