Letters from the week of January 11

Backwash, December 21

Hernia Relief

Your send-up of Skip Sleyster’s “column” in The Kansas City Star was great.

Why they don’t give him a column and make that ass-wipe Hearne Christopher Jr. pay to get his ink in the paper will always be a mystery. Ernie Henderson, Lenexa

Janovy, November 23 and December 21

Copy Right

I have previously complained about the Pitch‘s negative, one-sided and too-harsh style of journalism. However, I would like to update and adjust my criticism concerning two interesting and enjoyable articles I recently read by C.J. Janovy.

The first was her provocative interview with mayoral candidate Mark Funkhouser (at his home), which provided valuable insight into this candidate’s political philosophy and personal constitution.

The second story, “Blue Plate Blues,” was about the author’s observations about an eatery at Union Station intertwined with her personal connections to Union Station.

Besides lamenting the fact that the Harvey House restaurant at Union Station was employing the wrong cook and serving up corporate-made pies, C.J. said she goes to Union Station at Christmastime to “loosen up a little of the spirit buried in my coal-filled heart.”

After reading this heartwarming story that was also about C.J.’s concern for her 90-year-old grandmother, Iwould venture to say that not only is there something else in her heart at Christmas time besides coal, but that this is the kind of informative, constructive, uplifting, refreshing and worthwhile journalism this reader of the Pitch aches for. Clay Chastain, Bedford, Virginia

Gravy Train

My girlfriend and I went to the Harvey House the second week of December at 8:30 a.m. We asked the cook to put onions and green peppers in the potatoes and scrambled eggs. He couldn’t figure out that he was to cook them with the items and tried to serve them cold on top. We sent it back.

I had been craving a good biscuit-and-sausage-gravy breakfast. I received a very hard biscuit with a small spoonful of gravy on top. It was possibly the absolute worst breakfast I have ever tried to eat.

I still go to Union Station a couple of times a month, but not to Harvey’s until they change drastically. Neal Harves, Kansas City, Missouri

Web Exclusive: “Dougie’s Cross to Bare,” December 28

High Blood Pressure

A crowd gathered in hope of a freak show, perhaps the biggest freak show some of us had ever witnessed. Instead, we watched a sorry, small man stand in front of a cheap makeshift cross with loosely wrapped barbed wire covering his bare, disgusting body. Instead of seeing a bloodbath, we witnessed him get gently hit by a bat that wouldn’t have even been able to take out a spider.

With all of the hype that had been surrounding this story, I, along with everyone else, expected something major. Hell, we at least expected blood. He should have to pay me gas money for the useless trip I made in order to see an idiot in desperate need of attention.

One more thought: In the initial story regarding this event, Dougie claimed to get laid all the time. My question: Who in the fuck would touch this sorry excuse of a “man”? Fuck, even the schoolgirls were ugly. Melissa Reiter, Kansas City, Missouri

Cross Country Run

Well, I missed seeing Dougie get crucified, but I’ve seen performance actors for years. Dougie is reminiscent of a burned-out barfly with old jokes, whose laughter only comes from those with idols of a time forgotten. May I suggest that Dougie move to Los Angeles for a few months, get some new drama, then roll back into town with a renewed sense of his plan to entertain? He needs a wash, plain and simple.

Austin Anderson, Kansas City, Missouri

Fork Him

I am not amused or impressed with Dougie. It really must suck being him. People like him, who have to draw attention to themselves, are not cool.

As a chef, I wouldn’t want him frying my calamari or even touching my plate. Edward Love, Parkville

Feature: “Holiday Bummer,” December 14

Buck the System

I was really shocked to read your article describing the lengths that Kansas City’s panhandlers will go to in order to earn a buck.

I have many times given money and personal-hygiene goods to many of the people specifically named in your article. I had a substantial monetary gift ready for each of them and had planned to distribute it on or near Christmas Eve. Your story helped me realize that, while this would have been a good idea, giving is best done through a reputable organization. I will never make that same mistake again.

By the way, I purchased a 70-inch HDTV with surround sound and a home-theater living-room set with all of the bells and whistles. The money was put to a good use, and I can now sit back and relax and choose my philanthropic pursuits more wisely … while watching the Chiefs go to the playoffs of course! Name withheld by request

“May I suggest that Dougie move to Los Angeles for a few months, get some new drama, then roll back into town with a renewed sense of his plan to entertain?”