Kansas City Strip
Sleigh hells: Elves might be good at making toys, but they’re lousy at making cities. So Santa Claus planned to visit the metro area last week with a wish list for city fathers. Written with the help of dozens of youngsters in Kansas City, Kansas, the list asked for fun stuff that any town should have.
“Wyandotte County is a hard place for us young people,” says La Francis Nyakatura, a junior at Sumner Academy who helped write the list and asked Santa to deliver it to Unified Government officials. “We want really basic things that kids get in other places, like pools to swim at in the summer and fun, safe things to do.”
The kids asked for tennis courts, soccer fields, bowling alleys, skating rinks, safe streets, and jobs. Their city houses more than 100,000 residents but boasts not a single movie theater.
“These young kids don’t ask for much,” says the Reverend Ellis Robinson of First Baptist Church at 5th and Nebraska, which hosted one of the forums where the kids brainstormed their wish lists.
But apparently Santa’s reindeers aren’t in such good shape any more. A winter storm canceled St. Nick’s visit to the Municipal Office Building on 7th Street. But the youth groups met with city and county leaders, including Mayor Carol Marinovich, on December 18 to present the lists themselves.
No one’s made such a list on the Missouri side — perhaps because, as a recent citizen-satisfaction survey revealed, all that residents east of State Line Road ever get from their city is a lump of coal. But this year, please, dear Santa, bring Kansas City:
• Cops who can move as fast as pizza-delivery drivers.
• 911 lines that don’t ring 20 times before a recording picks up.
• Convention, show, and meeting facilities that are at least fit for livestock.
• A moratorium on autumnal optimism for the Chiefs, because Gunther Cunningham is not going to the playoffs — ever.
• A replacement for David Ucko who’ll make Science City a real world-class museum.
• 55 brand-new, shiny salt trucks at $100,000 each.
