Four Inane Questions with North Kansas City Fire Chief Dave Hargis

Dave Hargis. // Courtesy photo

Dave Hargis has been putting out fires in the field or behind the scenes for nearly four decades. “I started in the fire service in 1986 as a volunteer in the small town where I grew up and still live,” he says. “And I transitioned to a career firefighter after back-to-back lay-offs in the airline and construction industries.” 

Hargis—who has been a member of the North Kansas City Fire Department since 1991—has seen and done it all. Along the way, he’s dutifully moved up the ranks from fire apparatus engineer to line captain and subsequently battalion chief. He’s been NKC’s fire chief/emergency management director for the past six years. 

“I also have 12 years as a tactical medic with the swat team, concurrent with my time as a captain,” he says. 

When he’s not at the firehouse or helping his crews strategically douse flames, Hargis is teaching the next generation of up-and-coming firefighters how it’s done.

“I have been a regional fire service instructor for over 20 years,” he says. “And I served as president of the local firefighter’s union at one point.” 

We caught up with the proud husband, father, and grandfather to bombard him with our bonkers questionnaire. He may or may not have made us wait outside after we set off the station’s fire alarm. 

The Pitch: What’s the best-worst or worst-best fireman (or fire) joke you’ve ever heard? 

Chief Hargis: Asking a firefighter to tell you a joke is kind of like crossing a street while texting or hopping on one foot and blindfolded. It could turn out well—or be traumatizing. So, here goes:

Why did the firefighter bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!

What happened when the fire chief Googled “Ways to start a wildfire?” He got around 10,000 matches!

How do you know if a firefighter is at your party? He’ll tell you!

If you were a cartoon character, what cartoon character would you be? (And it better not be Smokey Bear.)

I grew up working on cars and watching all types of racing, so I think I would choose Speed Racer. I mean, come on—you have a super-cool, fast car, a brother named Racer X who wears a mask, another brother with a pet chimpanzee, and you get to travel around the world racing cars. It’s almost as much fun as being a firefighter.

If you were a betting man, how fast do you think a fire truck could actually go? (In theory only, of course.) 

Well, I’m not a betting man. (I do take risks, but don’t gamble.) But, in theory? Well, with a properly installed 1.21-gigawatt flux capacitor coupled with an antiproton beam core engine, a fire truck or ambulance could travel at warp factor 2—which is 2x the speed of light. 

Theoretically, this would allow crews to bypass traffic and road construction through a series of traversable wormholes and arrive on the scene before the incident happens.

Hands down, what’s your all-time favorite meal to eat at the fire station? 

During my first 25 years as a firefighter working 24-hour shifts, I became one of the people who regularly prepared meals for the “cook shack.” Our $5 menu ran the gamut from Reuben sandwiches made with spam (a.k.a. Speubens) to chili. And there was the always popular fried meat (any type), mashed potatoes and gravy, corn, and flatbread, as in sliced sandwich bread. 

My shift made it a regular habit to explore new recipes and foods such as calf testicles, tongue tacos, and spoonbill sushi—uh, often with mixed results. With that said, my all-around favorite meal to eat in the fire station? It was Saturday or Sunday breakfast. It was always the same comforting combo of food. Scratch-made sausage gravy, biscuits (sometimes scratch-made), hashbrowns on the griddle, bacon, and fluffy scrambled eggs. The food, along with the laughter and stories told at the table, made these great meals.