Craigslist musicians-wanted ad promises: like Deliverance, but with death metal
“Wanna do music with a positive Jesus message, but go on about dying & whatnot,” asks a recent, Northland-based Craigslist ad [sic]: “maybe sing about getting saved, then turn around and do a song about mutilation, maybe go old testemant on them; the eye for an eye, tooth
for a tooth business.”
If any of that strikes a chord, then your savior is named Cloyde, and he needs you to join him in his new “christian death metal & some bluegrass” project. His requirements:
we need a manderlin player, maybe a dobro, someone on a pointy electric guitar wth a distorted amp,
im the drummer, i have 2 bass drums with a double pedel on each one, i can give the devil his dues on that kit, i have lots of cymbals too, some i bought, some i made out of ordinary household items, you will see them soon enough
Oh yes, my brother, you will see them soon enough. Cloyde continues:
it would be nice to have at least 2 bass players, an electric one & a stand up one, i mean the electric bass player can stand up also
matter of fact, band rule #1, everyone applying must be able to stand, we are not taking applications for the wheelchair bound on this project, no offence, but there is going to be some dancing so you gotta be able to fully motivate your legs & hips..a little bit of a gimp leg may be ok, come try out
back to the bass players, we need two, not one that can play both, i like a low down dirty sound, in my christain death metal & my bluegrass
