An Annotated Version of a Note from the Star‘s Publisher
By ERIC BARTON
The Kansas City Star announced today that it wants to lay off more employees in its attempt to move from a mainstream print publication to a blog written in someone’s basement.
The announcement came via an e-mail by publisher Mark Zieman. The note includes plenty of corporate mumbo-jumbo such as “explore every option to navigate the current recession” and “involuntary reductions to augment the voluntary program.”
Here, then, is a paragraph-by-paragraph analysis of what Zieman is trying to say with his coded e-mail.
Subject: Voluntary Separation Program announced
To Star staff:
Beginning today, we will be offering a Voluntary Separation Program to the majority1 of regular, full-time employees at The Kansas City Star.
1 Unless you’re last name is Zieman or you’re currently in a relationship with me, I’ve got some bad news for you about your job.