Thank goodness President Trump will return to Kansas. Now he can check out all our hot GOP men!
“I looked at his ass and then I looked at his legs,” Trump said of U.S. Sen. Jon Husted of Ohio. “I said his ass—it’s like a pile of muscle.”
From left, Interior Secretary Doug Burgum, U.S. Sen. Roger Marshall and U.S. Rep. Derek Schmidt attend a Topeka rally featuring Vice President JD Vance on Oct. 26, 2026, in Topeka. (Photo by Thad Allton for Kansas Reflector)
We know that President Donald Trump appreciates the finer points of a masculine physique.
He’s told rally audiences repeatedly in recent weeks about the primo posteriors of Republicans running for office. He’s praised their good looks, straight from “central casting.”
“I looked at his ass and then I looked at his legs,” Trump said of U.S. Sen. Jon Husted of Ohio. “I said his ass — it’s like a pile of muscle.”
“Rick Jackson’s a very handsome, distinguished, beautiful-looking guy,” he opined about the Florida gubernatorial candidate.
I was concerned when news came Thursday that Trump had canceled a Saturday rally in Salina. Think of all the missed opportunities to ogle the glorious glutes of Kansas candidates! Surely they had good looks to spare.
But my worries were assuaged when Trump reconsidered and decided to visit Kansas on Sunday instead. Hopefully, we can hear his tributes to the macho men of the Sunflower State’s GOP. Allow me to offer a few pointers. As a gay man, I obviously have opinions about the attractiveness of various menfolk, but I have made a practice of keeping such opinions to myself.
The president has shown me a new way. (And thanks to photographer Thad Allton for capturing these stunning shots of top Republicans at Vice President JD Vance’s recent Topeka appearance.)
U.S. Sen. Roger Marshall points into the crowd at an Oct. 26, 2026, rally featuring Vice President JD Vance in Topeka. (Photo by Thad Allton for Kansas Reflector)
Look at this silver fox! U.S. Sen. Roger Marshall has a beautifully blended mane, mixing light and dark shades. Move lower on his face and you’ll glimpse blindingly white choppers. Some might say they’re a bit too much, but just as Marshall took a bite out of all the low-income Kansans he sued for not paying their medical bills, he’ll take a bite out of liberal priorities in Washington, D.C.
You might want to watch for his skin tone, though. In a recent Fox News appearance, Marshall appeared to be emulating the president’s pumpkin-hued face. We all know how attractive that is, of course, but we don’t want Marshall to just be a copycat.
U.S. Rep. Derek Schmidt raises his arms in enthusiasm at the Oct. 26, 2026, rally featuring Vice President JD Vance in Topeka. (Photo by Thad Allton for Kansas Reflector)
What a meaty mountain of a man!
U.S. Rep. Derek Schmidt‘s campaign website declares that he’s “standing tall for Kansans,” and the towering 2nd District congressman has the height to spare. Schmidt served three terms as Kansas attorney general, but he fell short in challenging Gov. Laura Kelly’s reelection bid four years ago. No worries — the prettiest face doesn’t always win in the popularity contest.
Schmidt faces a surprisingly competitive race this year from Democrat Don Coover, but perhaps he has the standing to persuade voters.
Kansas Attorney General Kris Kobach gestures to the crowd at the Oct. 26, 2026, rally featuring Vice President JD Vance in Topeka. (Photo by Thad Allton for Kansas Reflector)
Just look at that jawline! Kris Kobach might have lost his bid for U.S. Senate against Marshall back in 2020. He might have lost his bid for the Kansas governor’s race against Kelly back in 2018. But he hasn’t lost his bid for the squarest face of any Kansas politician.
If any single Kansas Republican could be described as being built out of LEGO bricks, that politician is Kris Kobach. Those sharp edges complement his sharp approach to immigration and crime. They don’t necessarily reflect the sharpest legal mind, though.
He also really likes guns, so look for his pin-up calendar any day now.
Kansas gubernatorial candidate Ty Masterson speaks at the Oct. 26, 2026, rally featuring Vice President JD Vance in Topeka. (Photo by Thad Allton for Kansas Reflector)
We’ve saved the dreamiest for last.
Republican Senate President Ty Masterson is a vision of well-oiled brilliance. First off, look at that pompadour. It’s a pompadour that says: “It doesn’t matter how much I do at my Wichita State University ‘GoCreate’ director job, my style sense gets me through.”
Second, look at that snazzy suit. Always well-tailored, Masterson has been a vision on two legs at the Kansas Statehouse for years. If the polling is to be believed, he might soon bring that incendiary hotness to Cedar Crest.
I kid, of course.
Trump, 80, may enjoy verbally caressing the highs and lows of younger candidates’ bodies (as well as the derriere of Trinidad-born rapper Nicki Minaj). Kansas has been blessed with a bountiful harvest of buff hopefuls. But does any of that really serve our cities and towns and farms? Do external qualities represent who’s best to guide us all into the future?
I think we all know the answer.
Clay Wirestone is Kansas Reflector opinion editor. His first book, “Opinionated: Kansas Journalists Who Proved Why Commentary Matters — Then and Now,” was published in September 2026 by the University Press of Kansas. Through its opinion section, Kansas Reflector works to amplify the voices of people who are affected by public policies or excluded from public debate. Find information, including how to submit your own commentary, here.
Kansas Reflector is part of States Newsroom, a nonprofit news network supported by grants and a coalition of donors as a 501c(3) public charity. Kansas Reflector maintains editorial independence. Contact Editor Sherman Smith for questions: info@kansasreflector.com.
