Tipton T-Bones

Missouri native David Koechner’s characters just might be the most obscene on any screen, big or small. They include perverse salesman Todd Packer on NBC’s The Office and pro-gun lobbyist Bobby Jay Bliss in Thank You for Smoking.

Koechner’s latest character is Gerald “T-Bones” Tibbons, a crude but crafty, comb-over-sporting con man who can be seen Wednesday nights on Comedy Central’s The Naked Trucker and T-Bones Show. The Department of Burnt Ends caught up with Koechner to talk about Missouri drifters.

Burnt Ends: There’s a lot of redneck in your characters. What experience do you have with rednecks?

Koechner: I’m from Tipton, Missouri, so it all comes true. It’s all honest. I don’t judge my characters. I play them for honesty, or try to. They’re humans, although they’re still clowns. We all like to laugh at clowns.

Koechner as Todd Packer from NBC’s The Office:

Were you here for a while?

I have family all over Kansas City. I love Kansas City. Man, I’m from there. How about this one? I got married in Kansas City. I guess that’s the best way to show my allegiance to our beautiful, wonderful Cowtown. Oh, Kansas City, Little Chicago, I love you.

How much Tipton is there in T-Bones?

Half of Gerald is based on this drifter that came to town one summer when I was working at my uncle’s gas-station-beer-joint café. On the weekends, he would just hang out at the four-way intersection in the middle of town. So he earned the moniker Four-Way George. Well, the city marshal came to him one night and tried to run him out of town. So he relates to me this story over a pinball game while I was waiting tables. He confides to me that this sheriff could bring his gun because he’s got razuurrs. So he was really going to fight the marshal, if he pulled his gun, with razors? I mean, razors aren’t like throwing stars.

What’s the most offensive thing Todd Packer has done?

Do you remember last season when there was a spot on [Steve Carell’s character] Michael’s carpet?

Yeah, the turd.

Yes. We’re assuming that Todd defecated.

Are you coming back to Kansas City anytime soon?

In March we hope to make a trip home during my son’s spring break. My parents live in Tipton, still. I’ve got to drop by Johnny Dare’s because I’ve never met him, and I’ve done his radio show a bunch. And I’ve got to drop by your [the Pitch‘s] office and take a shit on the carpet.

We’d appreciate that.

I’ll have to break in in the middle of the night and do it. And then call you and razz you about it.

We’ll put it on eBay.