Bus a Move

Hey, you, 20-something Brookside-Plaza residents and JoCo transplants. I’m talking about those of you who leave your expensive cars in the garage and ride the MAX bus on First Fridays to feel more urban. No, you cannot use your daddy’s Amex to pay your $1.25 fare. It’s also not necessary to spray all of that perfume. And please, don’t talk so loudly on your cell phone. It is a small, enclosed space. And while your wedding plans sound very expensive and your ring shines brighter than the sun, I just worked a 12-hour shift — and your voice hurts my brain.

Send anonymous confessions, congratulations or accusations to heyyou@pitch.com.