Louise’s bathroom is a scary, scary place

“Where We Pee” is a weekly excursion into a local music venue’s excretory facilities, with a premium on the witticisms scrawled onto the walls.

Louise’s Downtown, on Lawrence’s Massachusetts Street, is a bar that it very basic. They have a pool table, and the beer can be ordered in what are called “Schooners.” Schooners bring nearly a quart of beer to your table in an efficient fashion, like the cargo ships for which they are named.

The bathroom at Louise’s Downtown, however, follows in that basic fashion. The men’s room is lit by a single bulb, and features only a urinal, toilet, and sink. The walls are covered with graffiti, and the floor is so slick that even just standing still taking pictures nearly led to me crashing to the concrete. It is a frightening environment, and one that makes relieving one’s self a rather expedient process — due more than a little to the fact that one feels like wetting one’s self the instant they enter.